.Publisher's Keep in mind: The adhering to is the text message of a character from Trip 3 Leader Frank L. Culbertson (Captain, USN Resigned), reviewing the occasions of September 11.September 12, 2001 7:34 p.m.I haven't written very much concerning specifics of the mission in the course of the month I have actually been listed below, primarily for pair of reasons: the 1st being that there has been very little bit of time to do that kind of writing, as well as second of all since I am actually unsure just how pleasant I am sharing thought and feelings I share with family and friends with the rest of the globe.Effectively, clearly the world transformed today. What I state or perform is actually really minor contrasted to the significance of what happened to our nation today when it was actually struck through ... through whom? Revolutionaries is actually all we know, I think. Difficult to recognize at whom to point our anger and fear ...I had only finished a variety of duties this morning, one of the most taxing being actually the physical exams of all staff members. In a personal conversation adhering to that, the trip plastic surgeon informed me they were having an extremely poor day on the ground. I had no concept ...He described the situation to me as absolute best he knew it at ~ 0900 CDT. I was dumbfounded, at that point terrified. My first thought and feelings was that this had not been an actual talk, that I was actually still listening to among my Tom Clancy strips. It just didn't seem achievable on this incrustation in our country. I could not also visualize the particulars, also prior to the information of additional devastation started being available in.Vladimir visited quite rapidly, sensing that something extremely major was being discussed. I swung Michael in to the component also. They were actually likewise impressed as well as stunned. After our experts signed off, I tried to reveal to Vladimir and Michael as best I might the prospective magnitude of the act of horror in downtown Manhattan as well as at the Pentagon. They accurately recognized and also were really considerate.I eyed the World Map on the personal computer to find where over the globe we were actually and observed that our company were actually coming southeast away from Canada and also would certainly be actually skipping New England in a couple of moments. I whized around the station up until I found a window that will give me a view of New York City and also ordered the nearby electronic camera. It took place to be a camera, as well as I was actually appearing southern coming from the window of Michael's cabin.The smoke cigarettes appeared to possess a weird blossom to it at the bottom of the pillar that was streaming south of the area. After reviewing among the news articles our company simply obtained, I think our experts were examining NY around the amount of time of, or even quickly after, the collapse of the 2nd high rise. How unpleasant ...I scanned the cam during the East Shore to the south to observe if I might view every other smoke around Washington, or even anywhere else, yet nothing showed up.It was actually pretty hard to deal with work after that, though we had some to accomplish, however on the upcoming orbit our experts traversed the US additional south. All 3 people were operating a couple of video cameras to attempt to acquire sights of Nyc or Washington. There was actually haze over Washington, however no certain resource can be seen. Everything appeared incredible from 2 to 3 hundred kilometers away. I can not imagine the tragic settings on the ground.Other than the mental impact of our country being actually tackled as well as lots of our residents and also perhaps some buddies being actually gotten rid of, one of the most frustrating sensation being where I am is among isolation.Next time ... I presume the fatigue as well as mental strain received the very best of me. I could not remain awake and remain to compose. Today was still difficult, yet our experts began acquiring even more information, plus our team had the tribute of speaking straight with the Facility Supervisor, Roy Estess, who guaranteed us that the ground teams would certainly remain to function as well as guarantee our safety and security, as well as the risk-free function of the Place. We additionally heard from our Administrator, Mr. Goldin, that added that the partners in the Program are all absolutely committed to proceeding safe functions and help. These were actually never ever inquiries for me. I know all these individuals! The ground staffs have actually been unbelievably helpful, very understanding of the impact of the headlines, and also have attempted to be as useful as achievable. They have actually all been extremely expert as well as focused though I can not picture the interruption of this particular sort of information being available in and the thought and feelings that federal government structures may be at risk. They never skipped a beat, even when moving nerve center. And a team of elderly workers and also friends provided us a rather complete briefing about what was recognized and what was actually being done in the authorities and at NASA on Tuesday afternoon, which was actually really beneficial and also kind of them to carry out in the middle of all the distress. The Russian TsUP has likewise been encouraging and also practical, trying to uplink news articles when our own resources were actually inoperable, as well as claiming kind terms ...My crewmates have actually been fantastic, too. They know it is actually been actually a challenging time for me and also the individuals on the ground, and also they have actually tried to be as also keeled and helpful as feasible. Michael also repaired me my beloved Borscht soup for dinner. And also they give me lots of area to assume when I required it. They are incredibly understanding as well as certainly shocked at whoever would certainly perform this.I understand a lot of folks in Washington, a lot of people who take a trip to DC as well as NYC, plenty of that are pilots, that I really felt certain I would certainly get at least a couple of parts of problem over the upcoming couple of days. I got the initial one today when I found out that the Leader of the American Airlines jet that hit the Government was Chic Burlingame, a schoolmate of mine. I came across Chic in the course of cadet summertime when our team resided in the D&B with each other, as well as our company had great deals of classes all together. I can't picture what he needs to of undergone, and currently I hear that he might have increased better than our team may even think of by probably preventing his aircraft from being actually the one to deal with the White Residence. What a terrible reduction, yet I'm sure Chic was actually dealing with bravely to the end. And also rips do not flow the same precede ...It is actually hard to describe just how it experiences to be the only United States entirely off the earth at a time such as this. The feeling that I must exist along with all of you, coping with this, helping somehow, is frustrating. I know that our company are on the threshold (or beyond) of a horrendous change in the history of the planet. A lot of traits will certainly certainly never be the same once again after September 11, 2001. Certainly not only for the manies thousand as well as thousands of folks directly influenced by these ghastly actions of violence, however perhaps for everybody. We will certainly find ourselves really feeling in different ways regarding dozens of points, featuring perhaps area exploration, however.It is actually unpleasant to observe smoke cigarettes pouring coming from injuries in your very own nation coming from such a fantastic viewpoint. The dichotomy of getting on a spacecraft committed to strengthening daily life on the earth and also seeing life being destroyed by such planned, horrendous process is jolting to the mind, despite who you are. As well as the knowledge that every little thing will definitely be various than when our company launched by the time our company land is a little bit of disconcerting. I have confidence in our nation and in our leadership that our experts are going to do every thing possible to much better guard her and our loved ones, as well as to carry justice for what has been actually carried out. I possess peace of mind that the good people at NASA will definitely perform every little thing important to proceed our mission carefully and also return our company securely at the correct time. And also I miss out on every one of you quite. I can not exist along with you in person, and our company have a very long way to go to complete our objective, yet be actually particular that my heart is actually along with you, as well as recognize you remain in my requests.Submissively, Frank.September 14, 2001 10:49 p.m. An improve to the last character ... Luckily, it is actually been a hectic week up below. As well as to show that, like our country, our team are actually continuing our intended road along with business as usual (as much as feasible). Tonight the most up to date addition to the station, the Russian Docking Chamber will certainly be released coming from Baikonur, Kazakhstan. On Saturday evening (US opportunity), it will certainly dock with us, at a port never made use of prior to on the nadir side of the Solution Module. This brand-new module is going to provide us yet another location to dock a Progress or Soyuz and will provide a large airlock along with 2 able to be used hatches for performing EVA's in Russian Orlan suits, which our team are going to perform a few of just before our team get home.The issue just before in coping with recently was insufficient headlines. The problem now is actually way too much. It came at one time when e-mail was actually rejuvenated, and also there's inadequate time to review all of it! Plus it is actually too hard to cope with all of it at the same time. Yet I cherish obtaining it, as well as I truly cherish the fantastic characters of help as well as companionship I am actually obtaining.Our team are actually prospering on board, getting our work carried out, and also discussing points. Final evening our company possessed a long discussion over supper regarding the significance of these events, the achievable actions to follow, and what need to be actually performed. After supper, Michael challenged telling me that every e-mail he acquired coming from good friends in Russia pointed out specifically to inform me how regretful they were actually that this taken place, extending their condolences, and also asking exactly how I was carrying out. Vladimir educated me the Russian phrase for "acknowledgements" after consulting with the previous CDR, Yuri Usachev, on the phone in Star City. (Both the Russian as well as the English phrases are much too lengthy to articulate effortlessly.) Very types people.For the final pair of times, the Russian MCC has sufficed to broadcast online programs of radio news regarding the celebration and also affiliated stories, to ensure I was properly educated. Every specialist that has actually come on the line to discuss a method or a trouble contends some point expanded hellos to me with kind phrases. Tonight the Russian capcom told our team that due to the special day of recognition in the US, throughout the day people had actually been actually delivering blossoms and also lining all the wall structures of the US consulate in Moscow, and also this evening they were lighting candlesticks in the street outside the consular office. How the planet has modified.People almost everywhere seem to acknowledge the senselessness and horror in this attack. And also the enormous reduction. Moscow has dealt with these kind of complications in the last few years with house and also subway bombings, so they are actually as distressed to eliminate this hazard as our company are. Yet all-time low product line is actually that there are actually excellent individuals anywhere who desire to live in tranquility. I read through that a kid asked, "The United States is actually thus excellent to various other nations, we regularly assist everybody, just how can they dislike our company a lot?".I hope the instance of participation and leave that this spacecraft plus all people in the system illustrate daily will someday encourage the rest of the world to operate similarly. They must!Unfortunately, our experts will not be taking flight over the US during the time individuals are actually lighting candle lights. Don't recognize if our experts could observe that in any case. Our company carried out, having said that, see a really unique and stunning attraction a couple of minutes ago: the launch of our Docking Area on a Soyuz enhancer. Our experts were overtaking it as well as it appeared about 3 minutes after its own launch from Baikonur as the sunlight hit our terminal, so it was actually still unaware. It resembled a huge comet with a right, broad rear silhouetted against the black earth below. In spite of some poor illumination for some time as the sun struck our home window at a reduced perspective, I handled some online video of it as initially we passed the spacecraft, and afterwards enjoyed it start to mesmerize as it got altitude as well as rate. I recorded until primary engine cutoff and enhancer splitting up occurred equally as we approached sunup on the Himalayas. An unforgettable sight in an unforgettable week ...Lifestyle goes on, also in space. Our experts are actually right here to keep ... Frank.